TO THE SOLDIERS OF HHC 1-18 INFANTRY
I finally watched the movie you made for us. And what was my response?
I think it can all be summed up by this visual: Me, jumping up and down on the couch, clutching a pillow in the vain attempt to protect myself from what I am afraid I am about to see, screaming "don't show it!" as Sparty watches episode of 9 of Blood and Sand while I wonder wtf is with the apple pie?, and then laughing manically as I figure out wtf is with the apple pie!
Dirty! Dirty, boys! But well played and brilliantly executed!
I LOVED the movie! I laughed, I cried, I screamed, I threw up, and laughed some more. It ranks in the top five presents I have ever received. I have already made arrangements to have a little screening party so that the rest of the Spartacus cast and crew can share in this joy.
I apologize ahead of time for any misspelled, misunderstood or generally mangled names. Some of your guys have mush mouth and a few of the others speakreallyreallyfast.
Let's do a quick rundown of my favorite parts and my reactions as I watched them, shall we?
From the title and disclaimers to the outtakes, I thought it was an excellent job all around! The opening sequence with the lineup? I was already in stitches. Sergeant Major Carroll you should have been an actor! You were amazing! You sure gave Doctore a run for his dinari. And by the way, how tall are you, 7'6"?! And Michalski, you made an excellent Crixus! Mcguire, don't you think it's a little intimidating to load down a pig with so many weapons on his first day? Why not start him off with something compact, like a P90? And for the record, Sparty is not soft. No pig (or man) of mine is ;-)
I have watched this movie about 4 times now, and every time I see Sparty in the eye scope it just cracks me up. I always knew he had an inferiority complex against cows, but wow, I had no idea.
*gag* Haji thunder?! *gag* Really? REALLY?!? You boys sure know how to charm a lady! (at this point I had to pause the film and wait for my stomach to settle…blech)
Corporal Holt, Oh Shit Son! I just about fell off the couch. Who knew Sparty had it in him? Don't tell him this, but I think you won that round. Double Duranium…I like it.
Giant, MRAP with a .50 cal?? Do you know how many times I have wished for one of those while stuck in rush hour traffic in LA?
A personal message to Sparty regarding his letter home: PIG UP!
McKnight, niiiiiice pipes! I'll be looking for you on American Idol! You got my vote.
Col. John Cross, Oklahoma State. I'm sure you're a nice guy, but Halloween/Dayglo/DeerSeason Orange for a football team color? Even blind fans hate your team.
Sergeant Hessler, slap a tan on you and call you Spartacus! Or at least let me give you a dollar when you start working at "Thunder Down Under" in Vegas. Thank you for personally walking Sparty through the ropes and seeing him safely through to the other side. Just make sure all of you guys get home safely, too. Outside of the minor exorcist head that Sparty now seems to be sporting, he seems to be in good shape! Oh, and Florida State? You guys got rid of Bobby B. and hired JIMBO Fisher? What, was Dumbo too busy coaching DB's in Miami? Good luck with your title hopes this season. We'll end them in week two.
Gorgeous personal messages at the end, thank you. Sergeant First Class Delong, Command Sergeant Evans, and McKnight, your outtakes were priceless and absolutely charming. And I totally identify with you. There have been plenty of times on set when ALL of us actors haven't been able to say two words without spazzing out. Command Sergeant Michael Evans, that's a mighty big knife you got there on your desk. I think I'm scared.
Specialist Julian Messer, well done! It is a well known fact in my industry that you can make or break a movie with the editing. It is a thankless job and I thank you for doing it.
I love being a part of Spartacus and it is such a satisfying feeling to know that there are others out there that watch and enjoy the show. I hope it serves its function to entertain you, transport you to a different reality for a while, and maybe even to speak to you on a certain level of brotherhood, freedom, and honor. Fans like you guys are the reason that my work is important.
When 1st Sergeant James Carroll (now Sergeant Major Carroll, Congrats!) contacted me in December and asked me to send a Christmas message to the Vanguard Nation, I had no idea that this would be the end result. I was honored at the opportunity to be able to show support to the men and women who protect my freedom and follow in the footsteps of my father and grandfather. The past few months of interaction that I have had with The Vanguard Nation and the Sparty: The War Pig movie that you all have made has blown me away. There was a moment (albeit, a very girly moment, and don't judge Sparty for this) when the footage from the helicopter was being played that I had tears in my eyes. Tears of pride for you men and everything that you go through and sacrifice on a daily level, tears that even in a war zone a setting sun still looks beautiful, and tears for the absolute honor given to me by being allowed to see your world and for letting me into your lives in even the smallest way.
I can't tell you how much this video means to me. I think of you soldiers often and will keep you in my prayers. Thank you again from the bottom of my heart. Not only is this a highlight of my day, week, month, year, it is a highlight in my life. Take care of each other, know that there are people out here that love and support you. And don't believe the stereotype that "Hollywood people don't support the troops." We support you just as much as anyone, but we also hope for a day of peace when you men and women can stay home with your families and not have to risk your lives day in and day out. Please stay safe and get home safely to your loved ones.
